CNN’S Headlines

“KENNEDY CLAN GATHERS FOR FUNERAL AGAIN”|TRANSLATES|”THE MOST PIOUS CATHOLICS EXPERIENCE HAPPINESS IN 5-YEAR INTERVALS”

 

“PLAN TO RAISE SUNKEN CRUISE SHIP”|TRANSLATES| “TITANIC FANS FUND SHIP RAISING FOR SOUVENIRS & OPPS ON ANTIQUE ROADSHOW”

 

“FACEBOOK’S IPO STOCK STARTS AT $42|TRANSLATES|”ZUCKERBERG GETS JEALOUS AFTER VISITING DUBAI AND NOW WISHES TO COMPETE”

 

“PARALYZED BOY STUNS CLASS, WALKS”|TRANSLTAES|”TEACHER’S NON-UPDATED LECTURE WAS MORE PAINFUL THAN BEING HANDICAPPED”

 

“FLESH-EATING BUG VICTIM FACING AMPUTATION”|TRANSLATES|”DONT EVER TELL SOMEONE SMALLER THAN YOU, THAT THEY DON’T MATTER”

 

“HOUSE PASSES 643B DEFENSE BILL”|TRANSLATES|”U.S. BUILDS FENCE AROUND ITSELF TO STOP JEALOUSY OVER COUNTRIES WITH STRONGER $$”

 

“GET REAL! 35,000 FOR A SHOWER”|TRANSLATES|”DEPRESSED HOME SELLER GOES INTO DEBT, REMODELS SHOWER TO WASH AWAY HIS MISERY”

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