I leaned next to a beam like I normally do when I’m out to see a local show but Lisa and her gay friend kept poking me in the back and not letting me be a wallflower. That’s what you do at concerts. You don’t acutally dance at these ones. Alex2 is married to this Indian lady and when he visited there for the first time he got a hard-on from her 13 year-old neice who sat on his lap and leaned back against his chest. Alex2 goes to the Eden Lounge and flirts with ladies till he thinks they are ready to go home with him and then he jets. He says he’s loyal to his wife. Even if she won’t let him sleep in the same bed with her when he gets home. I thought we’d have better luck if Lisa and I went upstairs to see Grey March so that we could get a better view of Chip but there was a line of guys all lined up against the balcony and there was no room for us. We went back downstairs and Alex2 bought me a second Heineken. I smiled at the big African American guy at the seat again and asked him how many people had asked to take pictures with him. He was photogenic and he had cute cheeks. He asked me to make him my facebook friend and so I did.
After I made Lisa walk with one foot in front of the other, in a straight line up and down the Bank of America parking lot, we got into my car. I figured from the parking lot that she was okay enough to drive and so we headed to Club Charles. We sat and drank water out of plastic cups with limes in them to make them seem like they were gin and tonics and then I bumped into Bill who was Aaron’s cute friend, who I hooked up with. Bill is a bigger guy and I like bigger guys in fact I’m dating one right now who hasn’t emailed me today like I thought he would. So last night I thought about giving Bill my number but I just facebooked him instead.
While I was in the University of Baltimore bookstore writing more essays for my graduate applications I started making a list of things I do when I’m shy:
1. fold my arms
2. pick my lips
3. chew on ice
4. spread my legs out while standing to see how long I can stay in that one position